Tuesday, June 30, 2015
it's time to resurrect this blog - I have a lot to say!
A lot has changed recently and I find that I have a lot to say but don't really want to keep repeating the same sad, depressing but still kind of funny stories about my life as I'm navigating a divorce. I will probably get more into this but for now - I'm going to start out with this:
THINGS I GET YELLED AT FOR BY MY (NOT SOON TO BE FAST ENOUGH) EX:
*at the grocery store - he yelled at me for telling the checker I didn't need the gallons of milk in bags. EVERYONE (but me) apparently knows that a gallon of milk MUST be in a bag for transport home because - and I will quote here because I could not make this shit up - "it will sweat ALL OVER THE SEAT" on the way home. huh. my entire life I've just been driving willy-nilly all over the land with sweaty milk in my car. I have to say that I have no idea what kind of havoc this has been wreaking on my automobiles but it must be pretty severe to inspire that kind of dressing down in public.
* I turned on the TV in my room and then stepped into the shower. I shower for 5 minutes or less. when I got out the lights and TV had been turned off in the room. When I had the gall to question why on Earth he had come into the room where I was showering and turned off the TV and the lights - he actually said because I was wasting "so much electricity" by running them when I wasn't even using them. Now, I'm not a financial genius but I believe we are talking about a few cents - give or take. This from the man who runs the hot tub for hours at a time to "clear out his sinuses" (charming) or leaves EVERY SINGLE ceiling fan on at all times, etc. Lord knows I tried to hold it in but I was weak and was compelled to point out that he is a "blistering asshole". He disagrees with that assessment by the way. I turned the lights back on and he continued to turn them off, insisting that I did not need to use the light in the bedroom right then. I don't even have a sarcastic comment for that. It's just too nuts.
* we have a 3 lb Chihuahua. She doesn't like to swim but nonetheless finds herself in a swimming situation from time to time. While he was in the pool with the boys - I jokingly held said Chihuahua over the hot tub just to see her paddle her feet in the air. It's funny because she is swimming but not in the water.. you have to see it. Anyway - as I was dangling the 3 lb dog at least a foot over the water - He starts to yell at me NOT to put "THAT" dog in the pool. the reason? If I put her in the pool (and let me remind you that she is 3 lbs) she will "clog up all the filters with her hair" Now again -- I'm not a filter expert or even a dog expert but I have eyes and a pretty good judgement of probability and space. Even a simpleton like me can see that a tiny dog like that - wouldn't even clog his throat enough to kill him if I happened to shove her down it. Which, by the way, I would never do because I LIKE that dog. Even when presented with this analysis of the situation, he continued to yell at me like a madman for "ruining the pool" with the dog. Mind you we only have 2 weeks left in this house.
Ok that's it for now but I'll update as further transgressions are made! Yay me.
THINGS I GET YELLED AT FOR BY MY (NOT SOON TO BE FAST ENOUGH) EX:
*at the grocery store - he yelled at me for telling the checker I didn't need the gallons of milk in bags. EVERYONE (but me) apparently knows that a gallon of milk MUST be in a bag for transport home because - and I will quote here because I could not make this shit up - "it will sweat ALL OVER THE SEAT" on the way home. huh. my entire life I've just been driving willy-nilly all over the land with sweaty milk in my car. I have to say that I have no idea what kind of havoc this has been wreaking on my automobiles but it must be pretty severe to inspire that kind of dressing down in public.
* I turned on the TV in my room and then stepped into the shower. I shower for 5 minutes or less. when I got out the lights and TV had been turned off in the room. When I had the gall to question why on Earth he had come into the room where I was showering and turned off the TV and the lights - he actually said because I was wasting "so much electricity" by running them when I wasn't even using them. Now, I'm not a financial genius but I believe we are talking about a few cents - give or take. This from the man who runs the hot tub for hours at a time to "clear out his sinuses" (charming) or leaves EVERY SINGLE ceiling fan on at all times, etc. Lord knows I tried to hold it in but I was weak and was compelled to point out that he is a "blistering asshole". He disagrees with that assessment by the way. I turned the lights back on and he continued to turn them off, insisting that I did not need to use the light in the bedroom right then. I don't even have a sarcastic comment for that. It's just too nuts.
* we have a 3 lb Chihuahua. She doesn't like to swim but nonetheless finds herself in a swimming situation from time to time. While he was in the pool with the boys - I jokingly held said Chihuahua over the hot tub just to see her paddle her feet in the air. It's funny because she is swimming but not in the water.. you have to see it. Anyway - as I was dangling the 3 lb dog at least a foot over the water - He starts to yell at me NOT to put "THAT" dog in the pool. the reason? If I put her in the pool (and let me remind you that she is 3 lbs) she will "clog up all the filters with her hair" Now again -- I'm not a filter expert or even a dog expert but I have eyes and a pretty good judgement of probability and space. Even a simpleton like me can see that a tiny dog like that - wouldn't even clog his throat enough to kill him if I happened to shove her down it. Which, by the way, I would never do because I LIKE that dog. Even when presented with this analysis of the situation, he continued to yell at me like a madman for "ruining the pool" with the dog. Mind you we only have 2 weeks left in this house.
Ok that's it for now but I'll update as further transgressions are made! Yay me.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
THREE WEEKS LATER
Well, It's been 3 whole weeks since "the event". I have indeed survived in spite of all the gross, painful and disgusting things that have transpired. As unbelievable as this sounds.. my throat is STILL sore and I can still feel scabs way down there. I am back on a pretty normal diet but haven't had the nerve to eat chips or anything "sharp" yet... that may take a while.
Now that I am pretty much back to normal -- my advice remains the same for all of you: DON'T DO IT!!!!! I have lost count of the people who have told me in the last 2 weeks that they too are thinking of having their tonsils out. I've let each of them know that they are signing their own death certificate.
I like to help people.
Now that I am pretty much back to normal -- my advice remains the same for all of you: DON'T DO IT!!!!! I have lost count of the people who have told me in the last 2 weeks that they too are thinking of having their tonsils out. I've let each of them know that they are signing their own death certificate.
I like to help people.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
DAYS TEN, ELEVEN AND TWELVE
Hi again! sorry for the group of days post but for the past 3 days I just haven't had it in me -- it hasn't been much to write about either. On Friday, I visited my regular doctor who took me off off ALL pain meds, ibuprophen, asprin and tylenol PLUS alcohol! My throat was still killing me and her idea for managing that was some kind of lame-ass gargle that she had the pharmacy whip up that tastes like hand lotion and only numbs up my tongue, NOT my throat which is where the pain is!!!! Needless to say it is not the best alternative to pain meds so I've pretty much spent the past 3 days trying to just make it through the day with no meds at all and then going to bed at 9p and sleeping 12 hours. The sleep is helping more than anything else and my boys have been so nice to let me sleep as late as I need to. Basically, I've done some damage to my liver but if I can cut out anything irritating and give it a rest it should come back good as new -- just don't know how long that's going to take. I am supposed to get some results of the new tests tomorrow so maybe I'll be able to at least take something again. Going cold turkey has really sucked. I've been able to eat even less than before since my throat is just so raw and angry. Last night I was so hungry and so desperate that I actually put cooked oatmeal in the blender and made oatmeal soup. Yep.. the oatmeal in it's God-intended form was just too painful. Today I managed some chicken soup broth with some avocado chunks in it. I figure that should be a good shot of vitamins or something.... tonight I struggled with a piece of cheese pizza and lost. The good news is that today (Sunday) is actually the first day that I can say that I feel better. I can actually believe that I might recover and live a normal life again!
This has been without a doubt the hardest two weeks of my life. It seems so stupid given that all I had removed was a couple of peanut sized pieces of tissue. I've had so many nice friends offer help of all kinds -- but I've learned that it is very sobering when you realize that no one -- no matter how good the intentions or how vast the resources -- can help you. I truly believe that there is nothing worse than knowing that the only thing that can help you is the passage of time. When you are in that position, time crawls. I can't even tell you how many times I've looked at the clock and mentally calculated the days and hours until my "two weeks" was up. It didn't make the time go any faster. So, here I am at the end of the first 2 weeks. As promised, I feel better but not remarkably better and I don't think I will be back to NORMAL for a couple more weeks at the earliest. But, I'm going to live and I felt good enough to go to Carson's soccer game tonight so I'm getting back into the swing of things. I expect that this time next year some of this will seem humorous to me!
As my dear friend Joanne always used to say "I joyously anticipate the wonders that God has in store for me today!" I'm going to try to start tomorrow more joyously.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
DAY NINE
Day nine included several hours in the emergency room. Yes -I know that's crazy.
I went to work, still unable to really eat anything -- my throat is as sore as it's ever been - when will this end? Around noon I got a little heartburn so I took some dissolvable Tums. That seemed to make it better. I noticed that since yesterday, I was needing to take my Ibuprophen more frequently - I was taking 400mg every 3 hours but thought that was OK to do short term.
I was WRONG. At 4p I suddenly got what felt like terrible heartburn (I've only had that twice before, both times while pregnant) I was shifting in my seat and trying to get it to subside. I had 3 more packets of the Tums and it did not help at all. I left work at 430p to drive home and I very nearly did not make it. It is only 7 miles to my house but I almost had to pull over 3 times because I felt like I was going to throw up or pass out or both. The pain was so intense ...I've never felt anything like that. By the time I got home, I crawled to the bathroom where I laid on the floor writhing in pain and crying while Tim hovered over me trying to figure out what to do. By 530p it was obvious that I needed medical intervention so we went to the ER. Making this long story shorter: I had taken way too much Ibuprophen and not eaten enough and had basically made my stomach stand up and threaten to quit me. Everything in my GI tract was inflamed and very angry. The pain was almost unbearable and I also began having muscle spasms in my chest and back. The upshot is, it took 3 doses of morphine, 3 or 4 doses of anti-nausea meds and a muscle relaxer PLUS 2 bags of IV fluids just to get me to the point where I could talk to them and give them info. I was at the hospital for over an hour before all of this started to work. The boys were freaking out to see me crying and in pain like that. I got to come home at around 930p and I was wiped out. The good news is that with all the drugs I was given I actually got a decent sleep for once! I was given some new pain meds to deal with my throat which is still killing me and two acid reducers which I am taking faithfully!
I was also instructed NOT to take any more Ibuprophen at all --- apparently, that is a more dangerous drug than I thought, My Dr. told me that he has seen people bleed to death in just a few hours from a perforated stomach due to Ibuprophen! Fortunately that did not happen to me but I want everyone to learn from this and take the use of Motrin-like drugs seriously.. YOU CANNOT JUST TAKE AS MUCH AS YOU WANT.
I know this post is long and not very funny -- but that's how my day was too!
Oh, and I had my follow up appt yesterday -- My ENT says that I should feel a whole lot better by Monday -- that seems like a long time from now!
I went to work, still unable to really eat anything -- my throat is as sore as it's ever been - when will this end? Around noon I got a little heartburn so I took some dissolvable Tums. That seemed to make it better. I noticed that since yesterday, I was needing to take my Ibuprophen more frequently - I was taking 400mg every 3 hours but thought that was OK to do short term.
I was WRONG. At 4p I suddenly got what felt like terrible heartburn (I've only had that twice before, both times while pregnant) I was shifting in my seat and trying to get it to subside. I had 3 more packets of the Tums and it did not help at all. I left work at 430p to drive home and I very nearly did not make it. It is only 7 miles to my house but I almost had to pull over 3 times because I felt like I was going to throw up or pass out or both. The pain was so intense ...I've never felt anything like that. By the time I got home, I crawled to the bathroom where I laid on the floor writhing in pain and crying while Tim hovered over me trying to figure out what to do. By 530p it was obvious that I needed medical intervention so we went to the ER. Making this long story shorter: I had taken way too much Ibuprophen and not eaten enough and had basically made my stomach stand up and threaten to quit me. Everything in my GI tract was inflamed and very angry. The pain was almost unbearable and I also began having muscle spasms in my chest and back. The upshot is, it took 3 doses of morphine, 3 or 4 doses of anti-nausea meds and a muscle relaxer PLUS 2 bags of IV fluids just to get me to the point where I could talk to them and give them info. I was at the hospital for over an hour before all of this started to work. The boys were freaking out to see me crying and in pain like that. I got to come home at around 930p and I was wiped out. The good news is that with all the drugs I was given I actually got a decent sleep for once! I was given some new pain meds to deal with my throat which is still killing me and two acid reducers which I am taking faithfully!
I was also instructed NOT to take any more Ibuprophen at all --- apparently, that is a more dangerous drug than I thought, My Dr. told me that he has seen people bleed to death in just a few hours from a perforated stomach due to Ibuprophen! Fortunately that did not happen to me but I want everyone to learn from this and take the use of Motrin-like drugs seriously.. YOU CANNOT JUST TAKE AS MUCH AS YOU WANT.
I know this post is long and not very funny -- but that's how my day was too!
Oh, and I had my follow up appt yesterday -- My ENT says that I should feel a whole lot better by Monday -- that seems like a long time from now!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
DAY EIGHT
I'll make this short.
Went to work 1/2 day which was good - I was out of the house.
Had bouts of severe ear pain throughout the day and have consumed mass quantities of Ibuprophen today. Around 5p - ear pain worsened along with some of the worst throat pain yet.
Spaghetti is too sharp and I am STARVING and that is making me very unpleasant. Had mashed potato soup again.
I can now only tolerate warm food or beverage - cold anything makes it feel like electrical shocks are going through my throat and ears. I actually microwaved my iced tea. I got a bottled water today and then could not drink it until it warmed up.
My follow up appointment is tomorrow.
I'm going to punch my doctor.
This sucks.
PS: I'm now making a weird sound when I swallow. WTF?
Went to work 1/2 day which was good - I was out of the house.
Had bouts of severe ear pain throughout the day and have consumed mass quantities of Ibuprophen today. Around 5p - ear pain worsened along with some of the worst throat pain yet.
Spaghetti is too sharp and I am STARVING and that is making me very unpleasant. Had mashed potato soup again.
I can now only tolerate warm food or beverage - cold anything makes it feel like electrical shocks are going through my throat and ears. I actually microwaved my iced tea. I got a bottled water today and then could not drink it until it warmed up.
My follow up appointment is tomorrow.
I'm going to punch my doctor.
This sucks.
PS: I'm now making a weird sound when I swallow. WTF?
Monday, January 4, 2010
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