Hi again! sorry for the group of days post but for the past 3 days I just haven't had it in me -- it hasn't been much to write about either. On Friday, I visited my regular doctor who took me off off ALL pain meds, ibuprophen, asprin and tylenol PLUS alcohol! My throat was still killing me and her idea for managing that was some kind of lame-ass gargle that she had the pharmacy whip up that tastes like hand lotion and only numbs up my tongue, NOT my throat which is where the pain is!!!! Needless to say it is not the best alternative to pain meds so I've pretty much spent the past 3 days trying to just make it through the day with no meds at all and then going to bed at 9p and sleeping 12 hours. The sleep is helping more than anything else and my boys have been so nice to let me sleep as late as I need to. Basically, I've done some damage to my liver but if I can cut out anything irritating and give it a rest it should come back good as new -- just don't know how long that's going to take. I am supposed to get some results of the new tests tomorrow so maybe I'll be able to at least take something again. Going cold turkey has really sucked. I've been able to eat even less than before since my throat is just so raw and angry. Last night I was so hungry and so desperate that I actually put cooked oatmeal in the blender and made oatmeal soup. Yep.. the oatmeal in it's God-intended form was just too painful. Today I managed some chicken soup broth with some avocado chunks in it. I figure that should be a good shot of vitamins or something.... tonight I struggled with a piece of cheese pizza and lost. The good news is that today (Sunday) is actually the first day that I can say that I feel better. I can actually believe that I might recover and live a normal life again!
This has been without a doubt the hardest two weeks of my life. It seems so stupid given that all I had removed was a couple of peanut sized pieces of tissue. I've had so many nice friends offer help of all kinds -- but I've learned that it is very sobering when you realize that no one -- no matter how good the intentions or how vast the resources -- can help you. I truly believe that there is nothing worse than knowing that the only thing that can help you is the passage of time. When you are in that position, time crawls. I can't even tell you how many times I've looked at the clock and mentally calculated the days and hours until my "two weeks" was up. It didn't make the time go any faster. So, here I am at the end of the first 2 weeks. As promised, I feel better but not remarkably better and I don't think I will be back to NORMAL for a couple more weeks at the earliest. But, I'm going to live and I felt good enough to go to Carson's soccer game tonight so I'm getting back into the swing of things. I expect that this time next year some of this will seem humorous to me!
As my dear friend Joanne always used to say "I joyously anticipate the wonders that God has in store for me today!" I'm going to try to start tomorrow more joyously.
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